Dear Fellow Artists,

Itt hass bin a hole minit sins mi lass pusting. Wy hass yu nut ridden mee yet?

Ennyways, eye awso gut dis ledur frum mi fren Ewen. Shi finks eye don wemimbur hur ore sumding eben doh shi wuhs inn 2 theatur shose wif mee jis lass yere end shi hass gowin dwinking wif mee numinous times. Eye fink mebbe shi hass blokd awl dat owit. Edder dat ore shi iz fuking wif mee.

"Dear Ratgirl Sumding,
I went to the Rattie Nation and I am hip to Rattie Nation's jive. I am a
tall animal as opposed to a small animal. Is that okay? I do like all
animals. I work with many of them at my job. They come in & greet me
whenever they like (mostly funky lizards, cats, bullfrogs, toads, bugs &
moths). I have a good rapport with the fish in the fish pond as well.

My info is below.
Thanks, Sumdinggirl Sumding!

________________________________________
Ellen [Caul Mi De Jiraf]
Office Manager Animal"

Eye eraced awl uv hur contack infurmashun becuz awl dim furries owit dere mite sturt shoing up et hur wurk.

Oky, Ewen, eye nose yu hass dem nekkid pikchurs uv mi. Iff'n yu wunts too bee inn de Sperm Garden, yule haf too sine won uv dem comfydenturality agweemints. Jiraf's iz nut smull animuls, butt mi end yu bof no yu iz de saim talniss ass de Jobber, woo evybuddy nose iz part vole, part rat.

Seen ass how voles iz smuller den rats, eye fink yu cud bees jis abowit enny kind uv smull animul. Kine uv like dat taul biscuitball playr fwum Shankhigh. Jiss cuz hees taul dusnit mene hees nut Ashun.

Eye fot eye wud haf muir Ashun fwens seine how Ashun iz part uv Rattie Nashun, butt mebbe de awl speeks uv difrin dialeck.

OO. Sowi, guts too goh du mi biznis. Ladur gatur.

Your Fellow Artist,
Ratgirl Sumding

BMX Cud sumwon woo dusnit awweddi nose mi wites mi a ledur sumtime. Eye iz twine too weech owit. Iff'n eye dont mete sum diswabult peepul sune eyes nebur gonna git dat ENYA gwant.

Lub,
RG(SD)